Are there different kinds of loneliness? I think there are, I don't feel lonely at all in the aspect of having friends and family. But I do feel lonely with having someone who shares the same morals, thoughts and beliefs as me. Like I do not know anyone who's vegan, lgbtq+ or pagan... Sometimes I just feel so misplaced with the people I am with, even though I love them more than life, I really do, but I just feel misplaced. I wish I could sit and discuss Hecate, whilst eating a vegan sandwich and yeah.. Haha, no but really... I just I dunno how to explain it though. I'm not lonely, I don't feel lonely in that sense. But maybe someone will understand what I mean.
I posted a picture yesterday on IG that stated ''Just because I'm on a different path, doesn't mean I'm lost'' and it's so accurate. It is so darn accurate. I'm not lost because I have stopped following the stream. I'm so much more happy, and that's like the biggest fact of 2017.
I am and will continue for the rest of my life to just follow my path. One day my path will cross another ones path and we will create a path together. But I have so much spiritual healing to do and 2017 will be that year and it has begun. Yesterday I booked my flight to Italy once again, I'm going in a few weeks and I'm so happy about it. I will be going by myself, but it's something I just have to do. I need to make Italy a good memory. Me and my camera are going on an adventure and I know it will strengthen me so much. I don't know if I'm going to do video art or regular photography this time. But it will be well nice.
Well, time for lunch and then cleaning time. I'm home alone (flat mate is gone for a week!!!) so I want to make it cosy.
Peace out, love life and follow your path <3
Visar inlägg med etikett women. Visa alla inlägg
Visar inlägg med etikett women. Visa alla inlägg
lördag 4 mars 2017
torsdag 2 februari 2017
Health Choices and Vegan
It's late and I really should sleep but I'm researching and studying, tomorrow is my first day of work this week. I was hit by a nasty bug and has been coughing like an old man for days now. But fever is down and I*m feeling energized so I might as well work. So I told my boss that I have been offered another job and that I had said yes and going to quit within 2 weeks. I was scared shitless to tell her but it turned out really good and I feel happy and content.
Hmm... Other changes ? Not really, I've decided to go vegan again. I started to be fully vegan today and I really feel as though this is the right choice for me, my health and well being. I don't know how I*m going to solve it with my new work but I think it will work out fine, I guess I'll have to bring my own like soy bites and substitute it for the meet and skip the cream and such as.
Well, now it's time to sleep! I have to, going to be up in 6 hours. Goodnight and peace out, love each other
Hmm... Other changes ? Not really, I've decided to go vegan again. I started to be fully vegan today and I really feel as though this is the right choice for me, my health and well being. I don't know how I*m going to solve it with my new work but I think it will work out fine, I guess I'll have to bring my own like soy bites and substitute it for the meet and skip the cream and such as.
Well, now it's time to sleep! I have to, going to be up in 6 hours. Goodnight and peace out, love each other
söndag 15 januari 2017
Queer, Pan or Bisexual Homoromantic?
Tomorrow uni starts again. I've been accepted to a course I've wanted to read for ages but haven't had the points to do so. But now I do!!! It's Disability and Rehabilitation Science, and I'm stoked. It will open so many doors for me, I'm still on the program I've been on since spring but I really wanted to read this course and it's what I want to work with so I felt that it was the perfect time to do so. It's at another uni but a great one, in one of the country's biggest cities. I couldn't believe it when I was accepted, but that's what hard work and good grades get you!
At the moment, I am listening to Beatrice Eli, drinking some tea and thinking and rethinking a decision I have to make tomorrow that will either make it break or succeed to the best possible. Tomorrow afternoon I will know, I will have to, haha. I know what my heart wants but the question is if I SHOULD do it. We will see. Need a good talk with my mum and with my best friends before I make the decision again I think. I spoke to them all yesterday for a good hour each but you know how it is... You think you've made the choice but then you sit down and start to think about again and you are more confused then before.
Well, soon time to take a walk with the dog before I need to prepare for work tomorrow. I like Mondays nowadays. It's nice. But it's swimming on Mondays at work and I can't put on make up, haha. I have been able to get my eyebrows on fleek for weeks now and the days I don't wear make up I feel so naked, haha. I've found a new side of me that I had no idea I had, but it's funny. I like whom I've turned into and it really feels as though I've found myself. This past 1,5 year has given me a lot of lemons but I'm so thankful for every little drop of that sour lemon juice, I'm seeing things from different perspectives and all and I'm just finding myself. I've broken with people that couldn't help me grow into the person I wanted and needed to be, I've cried rivers and I've been angry with myself so many times this past year but it's been worth it. In a couple of weeks me and a friend are going somewhere I've wanted to go for a very long time, and she volunteered to come with me. We haven't known each other for a very long time, like 1 month or so, but she's well neat and nice.
Thanks to this time I can be more open with whom I am as well, I don't identify as a lesbian anymore, I'm ... a human. If they really want to put a label on me I would say I'm queer, or maybe pan. Because... I don't know. Special people will catch your heart no matter what. Sexuality still confuses me as fuck, because I only fall in love with women, but I would hook up with a man, you know? One said that it's called bisexual homoromatic. Maybe so. But even if it confuses me I'm still content, because I don't feel the need to label myself. I will take each day as it comes and when I meet the right person for me I'm sure it will all fall in place. It usually do, doesn't it? Oh well, one day I might label myself again or maybe I won't. Only the universe knows.
At the moment, I am listening to Beatrice Eli, drinking some tea and thinking and rethinking a decision I have to make tomorrow that will either make it break or succeed to the best possible. Tomorrow afternoon I will know, I will have to, haha. I know what my heart wants but the question is if I SHOULD do it. We will see. Need a good talk with my mum and with my best friends before I make the decision again I think. I spoke to them all yesterday for a good hour each but you know how it is... You think you've made the choice but then you sit down and start to think about again and you are more confused then before.
Well, soon time to take a walk with the dog before I need to prepare for work tomorrow. I like Mondays nowadays. It's nice. But it's swimming on Mondays at work and I can't put on make up, haha. I have been able to get my eyebrows on fleek for weeks now and the days I don't wear make up I feel so naked, haha. I've found a new side of me that I had no idea I had, but it's funny. I like whom I've turned into and it really feels as though I've found myself. This past 1,5 year has given me a lot of lemons but I'm so thankful for every little drop of that sour lemon juice, I'm seeing things from different perspectives and all and I'm just finding myself. I've broken with people that couldn't help me grow into the person I wanted and needed to be, I've cried rivers and I've been angry with myself so many times this past year but it's been worth it. In a couple of weeks me and a friend are going somewhere I've wanted to go for a very long time, and she volunteered to come with me. We haven't known each other for a very long time, like 1 month or so, but she's well neat and nice.
Thanks to this time I can be more open with whom I am as well, I don't identify as a lesbian anymore, I'm ... a human. If they really want to put a label on me I would say I'm queer, or maybe pan. Because... I don't know. Special people will catch your heart no matter what. Sexuality still confuses me as fuck, because I only fall in love with women, but I would hook up with a man, you know? One said that it's called bisexual homoromatic. Maybe so. But even if it confuses me I'm still content, because I don't feel the need to label myself. I will take each day as it comes and when I meet the right person for me I'm sure it will all fall in place. It usually do, doesn't it? Oh well, one day I might label myself again or maybe I won't. Only the universe knows.
lördag 3 december 2016
Sexuality
Sexuality... that's a word I think we all overthink. Are you straight, gay, pan, bi, trans etc etc... But does it matter? I know for some it does really matter and it's important to define their self-being. BUT DOES IT REALLY MATTER? For me, and this is for me only I am not speaking about anyone else's thoughts here, for me it doesn't matter any longer. I have learnt through the years that I am just human. I fall, and I fall hard for someone. I thought it was so important to define who I was and who I am that I put a label on myself without, maybe, being completely honest to myself.
I kind of felt that I had to. Because, isn't that how society works? ''- What are you'' ''- who are you?'' and so on. This past year I have grown ALOT. Lite a lot a lot. And I have realised that I am only human. With human needs and humans feelings and thoughts. And that's how I'm going to define myself for the rest of my life, with whoever I get together with. And it's the most releasing feeling every to just get that out of my system. It feels great!
Well, that was all I needed to get out. So now I'm going to go to bed, smile a bit and sleep through the night with peace.
Peace out
I kind of felt that I had to. Because, isn't that how society works? ''- What are you'' ''- who are you?'' and so on. This past year I have grown ALOT. Lite a lot a lot. And I have realised that I am only human. With human needs and humans feelings and thoughts. And that's how I'm going to define myself for the rest of my life, with whoever I get together with. And it's the most releasing feeling every to just get that out of my system. It feels great!
Well, that was all I needed to get out. So now I'm going to go to bed, smile a bit and sleep through the night with peace.
Peace out
onsdag 31 augusti 2016
He Wasn't Born a Rapist
As I walked by the group of young men I felt myself tense up and walk a bit faster, discretely I turned my music off so I could hear if they said something of started walking after me. Exaggerated? Maybe, but why would I, a soon to be 27 year old woman be scared of a group of young men, what have they done to me? Nothing! Nothing at all, isn't it crazy how society is? I mean, today's society is built in a way where we women are scared of walking out alone, we fear being raped, followed and sexually harassed. It shouldn't be that way, never.
Now people, probably mostly men, will say "not ALL men are like that". I know that! I know plenty of nice and kind men. But WHY, why in the whole wide world do we women, no matter age, have to be scared when we are out alone. This summer I have read about countless of sexually harassed young women at festivals and such as, where men have taken the freedom to touch and in some occasions they tried to rape the woman. I feel sick hearing that, I do wonder what their mother would say if she knew what her son just did. That mother who birthed him, raised him - he should be respecting the woman... Or? Are there so many boys growing up learning that women are objects and deserve being treated as such? I really can't wrap my bead around all this. Is it purely the up bringing that creates it? Or is it the media, peer pressure? Maybe all the above, I don't think will ever understand.
As I now sit comfortably on my sofa, sipping on my tea with the dog snoring next to me. The thoughts of knowing that right now, a boy is born into this world and he will be raised by a loving mother or at least meet with wonderful women that will impact his life. And even though these women will iimpact him, he will one day go to far with a girl or a woman and it saddens me. How can we in the society raise men that will one day grow up to respect the women in this world? Isn't it everyone's responsibility to make that both men and women, girls and boys walk safely on our streets? I do think so, because a boy doesn't born into becoming a rapist or someone who sexually abuses our young girls on festivals.
Maybe I am wrong in all this, maybe I am right. But I do know that we all play a part in how the society ends up.
Now people, probably mostly men, will say "not ALL men are like that". I know that! I know plenty of nice and kind men. But WHY, why in the whole wide world do we women, no matter age, have to be scared when we are out alone. This summer I have read about countless of sexually harassed young women at festivals and such as, where men have taken the freedom to touch and in some occasions they tried to rape the woman. I feel sick hearing that, I do wonder what their mother would say if she knew what her son just did. That mother who birthed him, raised him - he should be respecting the woman... Or? Are there so many boys growing up learning that women are objects and deserve being treated as such? I really can't wrap my bead around all this. Is it purely the up bringing that creates it? Or is it the media, peer pressure? Maybe all the above, I don't think will ever understand.
As I now sit comfortably on my sofa, sipping on my tea with the dog snoring next to me. The thoughts of knowing that right now, a boy is born into this world and he will be raised by a loving mother or at least meet with wonderful women that will impact his life. And even though these women will iimpact him, he will one day go to far with a girl or a woman and it saddens me. How can we in the society raise men that will one day grow up to respect the women in this world? Isn't it everyone's responsibility to make that both men and women, girls and boys walk safely on our streets? I do think so, because a boy doesn't born into becoming a rapist or someone who sexually abuses our young girls on festivals.
Maybe I am wrong in all this, maybe I am right. But I do know that we all play a part in how the society ends up.
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