Snow, Realisations and Clubbing

The snow that covered our roofs over night is slowly being washed away by the rain. I have just come back in again after a wet and cold walk with the dog. Tomorrow I'm starting one of my new jobs!!! I'm so excited and nervous. But I know whom they are and I have actually worked there before, three years ago... And known them for four years, but I'm nervous to meet them all again and to start with something completely different than before. That is one of the places I'll be working at from now on. It will be so nice to be mixing it up a bit and work with different people and see new things, and most of all... Learn.

So, I'm happy with what life is offering me at the moment. I haven't been the happiest or the healthiest person on this earth the last couple of months. I haven't really realised it myself until now. Or until last night where I just burst out in tears to a not so sad movie, haha. I realised that this past year has given me a lot of lemons but also a lot of lemonad and sometimes a mix of them both in the same situation. As I wrote yesterday, breaking up was the best and worst... Maybe worst is wrong word, it was the hardest. Yes, the best and the hardest thing I've had to do in a long long time. And it's been hard. It was hard to come to the realisation that nothing was going to change, it would go on and on like it was and I'd be walking around feeling so uncomplete and sad. That was the hardest and saddest by the whole thing. But the best thing is, and even my friends say it, is that I have grown as a person so much. Even my boss said it, haha.

Tomorrow we're actually going out clubbing. Well first dinner at a fancy restaurant and then out clubbing. Me and four other friends. Might be meeting up with my closest friend at the club. But I haven't decided yet. It will be fun though, especially hanging out with a one of them. We've come pretty close and we have tons of fun together and I'm happy to get to know her better.

Well well, time to do something productive... Maybe like sleep, haha. No, but clean the bedroom maybe. I dunno.

Peace out!

The best and Worst

Breaking up with my ex was one of the best (and worst) things I've ever done. I really thought we'd be together for a very long time and get married and have a family etc etc... But, breaking up gave me a new sense of... I don't know. It gave me a boost in confident and has made me make a lot of changes in life and work life. I know I loved her, more than words can describe and I didn't break up with her with lack of love or feelings for her. But sometimes it just doesn't work and getting to the point of realisation was big for me.

Both my boss and colleagues has seen a change in me after it, they say I've become brave, more open and tough, haha. And I feel it too, I can say no now, I can say my mind right away without holding it in for too long and so on. Í am think for how much I grew in our relationship, and how much she made me realise what I can be. So now, that I start a new chapter in my life I am thankful for what has been and I am more than ready to start everything fresh and new.


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Since my surgery(ies) is/are coming up I'm trying to figure out what sports I will be able to do after... These surgeries are making me unable to run since they are fixating two toes so they will be completely unable to move. It saddens me a bit, but I will still be able to take my super long walks. But my dream was to start with running track next year. But also, it's better to be able to walk without pain and wounds than being able to run. I am thinking of swimming, I've done that before... Or something else, but I don't know what that something else would be. I will look and figure something out. First of all I have to manage 12 weeks of recovery, haha,

So Much Is Changing

There's a weird sense of happiness bubbling within me. A happiness I can't explain in words, maybe not in anyway. A happiness that's mixed with being scared, extremely scared and excited. In a few months my life will be completely different again. Life will never be the same again... Changes will be made and life's going to be hard, spectacular and completely wonderful. I know that. It's scary ! But, in a very good way.

Here I am... I should be asleep, but I got stuck with youtube and good documentaries. I'm suppose to be up in just a few hours, but my mind is swirling around and I'm thinking about the future. I want the time to rush but in the same time I need it to slow down so that I can prepare myself. Can't have both, can I?

My furry friend is snoring like a man, my flat mate is snoring like an even older man ( I can hear it through the walls) and I'm thinking about the course me and my work buddy are going to next week. It's a really interesting course and I think I'll learn a whole lot when it's over, it's two more times before we have passed it. The last time I left feeling so inspired to do an even better job with my patient so I hope the next two times will be as good. The women who holds the course is so much fun to be listening to. She involves the whole of her body and different tones of her voice and all that. It's very interesting and fun.

I'm craving mango, so bad... And jack fruit. I think I'll pass by the Asian store tomorrow to get some canned jack fruit, haha. And fresh mangoes from the store. I need it, I wish I could order some now, haha. Oh, I remember eating my first mango in Uganda... Soon 6 years ago ( OMG!!!! ). I have never been able to find such tasty mangoes here in Sweden since then. I miss them. But the mangoes here will do now that I have crazy cravings haha.

This is such a random post... But that doesn't matter, does it. I just feel like writing tonight. But I think I'll give sleeping another try so that I can be somewhat human tomorrow.

Goodnight people. Take care of each other and remember to love.

What a Great Week it Has Been

What a unexpected great week it has been! As I wrote earlier this week usually is pretty hard on everyone in the family. But I decided to have a great time and a great birthday and I did. The day started with me and Ruben taking the bus to the nearby town to meet up with M. She picked me up after she left work and I thought we were going to the mall to have a cup of coffee and just hang there but instead she drove me home to her place where she had prepared something small. It was so sweet of her! I mean she didn't have to! But we had some tea, I snuggled with her extremely big cat and we talked about everything between the earth and the sky. I really had a good start to my birthday. After that she drove me home to my mums place and then we went to eat lunch at the mall. It was just a wonderful start to that day, that I had dreaded for a few weeks. After a while we said goodbye and I met up with my mum and we went on a shopping spree and just enjoyed ourselves.

Today my best friend came over and we took a 2h walk in the woods with Ruben the dog, it has been a beautiful day today. Now the weekend is approaching and I will just take it easy and enjoy myself. I will walk as much as possible these coming two weeks because I have been called ( after nearly a year ) to do my foot operation. I will do one toe at the time, but the recovery time is over 1 month of time so it will be hard. But worth it because I will be able to walk better and longer without pain and sores. I'm super nervous and scared, but also happy that I can get it done.

Now! I will light some candles, have some mull wine and watch Game of Thrones... I find that pretty fab.

And Happy belated Samhain again :)